Day 18 - Kirkby in Ashfield to Bolsover

It was nice to open the curtains and see that the rain had stopped, the wind had calmed down and there was blue sky! This far into my walk and with an adjusted reality of what's possible, today was what I now call a shorter day of only(!) 12.25 miles which meant I could enjoy a long sleep and get out of bed around 8am. I had Simon's porridge for breakfast, which was full of seeds and nuts and felt like a great way to fuel the day ahead. He made me an aeropress coffee, I didn't take any in my flask as I wanted to stop in the next town Sutton in Ashfield and buy one. I made myself a packed lunch of hummus salad sandwiches, put on my now dry boots and waterproof trousers for an extra layer of warmth and headed towards Derbyshire just after 10am. 

Another flat walk, partly along an old railway line to the coffee stop! I've been trying to go to independent coffee shops where I can and here found a spacious cafe, busy with local regulars eating and drinking. On walking in I felt the opposite in the welcome I received compared to Leatherhead many miles and blog posts ago! Everyone was very friendly, I had a black coffee and could have stayed longer but I'd only done about 3 miles! 

I really enjoyed the second part of my walk, I ate half my sandwiches on the move realising I'd taken the morning a bit too easy! There was lovely long-shadow sunlight and I was crossing fields and walking on tree lined paths. I decided to follow the map and rather than the road, taking the footpath to Glapwell which crossed 2 fields and was a very muddy mistake! I found a bench and ate the rest of my lunch and was then onto the 3rd route map for the day to my destination of Bolsover. 

I decided to not follow the footpath and instead stay on the road which was quite busy but had a wide grass verge that I could walk along safely. I hadn't been walking long when a car stopped and the driver said 'are you alright duck, do you need a lift or owt?' I said thanks but declined as I didn't have too far to go. The offer of a lift immediately reminded me of time spent with Ro in Ireland. 

Before he got his passport he found out he could travel to Ireland with his provisional driving licence and we went 3 times (it could have been 4 - all the trips blur into each other). A friend in Bradford, Chris, had good friends in Sligo and went often with his family Cat, Clara and Angela. He invited others to come along and I remember being there with Ro, Lavinia, James, Andrew and Helen at different times. Chris's friends were connected to the Methodist church and gave us the keys and free rein of the building which provide us with a perfect base for exploring this beautiful part of the west coast of Ireland! By day we walked, went to the beaches, swam in the sea, climbed hills and by night we went to the pubs to hear live music and once went to what was possibly the only nightclub in Sligo! We also took tents and camped, once in Donegal and once (because we hadn't checked the weather!) in a force 8 gale but then just after midnight the 5 of us got rescued by a woman called Fionnuala from a cottage down the road and it turned into a wonderful night that we never forgot! Ro was very touched by the hospitality from a stranger and even wondered if she was an angel! It made all of us want to be able to offer hospitality to others in the beautiful way that receiving kindness can make you want to pass it on, and we did back in Bradford.

When we were walking, cars sometimes slowed down and offered a lift even without us putting our thumbs out and if we'd walked far we gratefully accepted. One time we did have our thumbs out to hitch a ride back to Sligo but there were 5 of us so we had to split, a man stopped in what is a hazy memory but I think was an open top car and Ro and I took the lift. We got talking and he wanted to show us a stunning part of the coastline so made a diversion but it was totally worth it, we were both blown away by the rocky beauty we were seeing that seemed to stretch for miles, the sky and sea looked dramatic as a backdrop. One of those experiences you're glad someone is there to share it with and you talk about for years after. I feel sadness that I can't talk about it with Ro any more but grateful for the memory and the times we did talk about it. Our friends were worried because for some reason (either too immersed in the moment or more likely, phones with no battery!) we hadn't let them know about the detour and they wondered why we weren't back at the church when they arrived, as we'd taken the first lift. I remember trying with Ro to explain what we'd seen and not doing it justice. 

Part 2 of this story is a return trip to Ireland. I can't remember the details of how Ro and I ended up walking along the part of the coastline that had previously amazed us but there we were. Incredibly happy to be there, seeing it close up, until we reached a field of cows and calves, they however didn't look or sound happy as we started walking past. We made a quick decision that we both agreed was best to walk on the other side of the fence. It was difficult to climb over and the other side was a narrow ledge right on the cliff edge! Both options had risks but we didn't want to face the cows. We were glad when we reached the road to be heading back safely to Sligo. Just one of many Irish adventures!

I was now not far from Bolsover, I could see the M1 in the distance along with some mountain like clouds! I was meeting my parents Ian and Judy, who were walking with me the following day. My mum had booked a BnB and I arrived first. The owner knew about my walk as my mum had mentioned it and so she wasn't surprised to see me with a big bag and muddy clothes. I took my boots off outside and she took me up to my room. As well as running the BnB she is a podiatrist and in my room had left me an electric foot spa and epsom salts! She asked how my feet were doing and I said I hadn't really had trouble with blisters as I put plasters on anything that starts and then they don't bother me. At the end of a day walking 15+ miles my feet are tingling but then always feeling good to go the next day! 

I sat drinking peppermint tea with my feet in the spa and then had a shower. By that time my parents had arrived. It was really lovely to see them and to be able to walk some of this journey with them, as we've done quite a lot of walking together and they had known Ro for many years. They'd also brought some essentials - more coffee bags so I was never in the 10 miles before coffee situation again, dark chocolate and underwear! My sister had sent a gift of chocolate coffee beans and seaweed crisps with them as well! 

We went to a nearby pub for dinner and I ate 3 delicious courses, I'm really noticing how I'm needing to eat more for the energy required each day. We agreed to meet for breakfast at 7.30am as it's a long day of walking tomorrow and I will finally reach Yorkshire! 

Day 17 - Nottingham to Kirkby in Ashfield

As you've probably realised I've fallen behind on these posts, in the evenings I've been talking, eating, sleeping and each day I'm walking. No time for writing! 

I'm happy to say I have reached Bradford, I'm home! I'll be continuing to update the blog over the next few days with a post for each day of my journey because there are stories and memories still to share.

There were 14.5 miles ahead of me today and after my rest day and 2 nights in Nottingham I wondered how I'd feel walking again. It was the first day I'd set off with rain falling. I put waterproofs on, including covers for my rucksacks (first time on this journey) and headed out to walk through the city to the countryside. The first thing I noticed was how warm the air temperature was compared to the previous days walking, it was about 12 degrees and felt balmy! I very quickly had to stop and take some layers off. It also stopped raining before I'd even had a chance to put some music on to give me that boost on a grey day and put a spring in my step which I felt I needed to get myself going again. I had set off after 10am a bit later than planned but it worked out well rain-wise. 

My app told me to go West so of course I got the Pet Shop Boys in my head and walked through Nottingham listening to their music and remembering when Ro and I heard them in passing at Glastonbury and stayed to dance for a while.

My knees felt a bit stiff and I noticed the weight of my bags but I just needed to warm up and quickly found my rhythm again, happy to be back on the road and getting ever closer to Yorkshire. However today did feel like a day I needed to just get through.

After all the rain the previous day there was a lot of water at the side of the road and a few car drivers decided to intentionally drive fast through the water to splash me, it happened 3 or 4 times. I've experienced this before in Bradford and depending on how I'm feeling can make me angry or upset but also sad that people think it's ok or funny to do it. It's worse if I'm heading out somewhere, but today I felt I was one up on these drivers because I was FULLY WATERPROOFED! In my head, and possibly out loud I said (with some extra swearing!) 'bring it on, it doesn't bother me at all'

John had made me coffee before I left, one to drink with breakfast and one for the road. I was going to stop in a park for a drink but weirdly a large group of pigeons decided to start following me, even though there was someone putting food down for them a few metres away. I didn't want their company so carried on through the park and stopped on a bench near some shops just as it started raining again, but more like drizzle. Continuing through houses, I walked down an alleyway and suddenly was in fields. I passed a few dog walkers and asked one which path I should take as they were parallel. He said the left was the bridleway for horses and would be muddy so I should take the other. I hadn't gone far when a small fly flew directly into my open eye! I wasn't able to wash my hands and with no mirror didn't want to go digging around to try and get it out. I poured some water in my eye, but could still feel it in there, it wasn't bothering me much so I carried on. The paths were really easy to follow and a mix of open fields and woods.

At 2pm I realised I needed to eat lunch so found a wall next to a road that was low enough to sit on and ate the delicious leftovers from last night's feast! Some refreshment stops are picturesque and some are just practical. I couldn't spend too long there and I'm sure the location helped me move on quickly! I still had 5.5 miles to go and it felt like a day where it never really got light and would soon get dark. There was also some elevation which I was happy about but with my big bag could slow me down. I walked up quite a steep hill to a moor area then down and along an old railway line which was muddy in places. I listened to podcasts and music as I needed some external input today.

This was an old mining area and I passed reminders of the machinery, community and history of these places. I'm grateful that this walk has taken me through so many areas of the country I've never heard of and might never have seen. That's the beauty of Slow Ways, I planned my route based on 4 specific locations and the rest a random mix taking me North in the most direct off-road route possible .

For the final stretch into Kirkby in Ashfield I decided to change the route and stick to roads, and on reaching my hosts for the night - Janet, Simon, Heather and Abi - Janet told me I had made a good decision as she knew the path I would have taken and said it would have been very muddy! The last 3 miles I walked in heavy rain. Part of me regretted not setting off an hour earlier from Nottingham as I would have had more light rain in the morning but not encountered the downpour of the early evening.

I can't complain because having walked around 2/3 of my total distance and only had 3 miles of heavy rain is pretty incredible. Also on reaching my destination I rang the bell and entered the porch to a warm welcomed by Janet and Simon who before I'd even removed my boots had taken the rain covers off my bags and my waterproofs away to start getting them dry! Hot drinks, pizza and conversation followed, about sewing and knitting, walking, walking gear and the world in terms of travelling and politics. 

Before we ate I took a shower and remembered the fly in my eye from 8 miles ago! I looked in the mirror and it was still there! It hadn't caused any irritation and I removed it easily and slept well later that night.

Day 16 - Rest Day - Nottingham

When planning this walk I decided to give myself one rest day out of 24. As I've been on this journey I have thought possibly more than one non-walking day might have been good, but this was usually after a late night, or waking up in a comfy, warm bed and not wanting to leave it! I don't feel like I've been putting too much pressure on my body walking every day, if anything it seems to have loosened tight muscles and I always know I can take public transport if needed. I enjoy the nightly routine of checking the following day's distance, working out what time to have breakfast and start walking in the morning which has been anything from 7.45am - 10.15am. It's been a guesstimate most days as I'm not a numbers person, but it's all worked out well.

I considered various places for a rest day, but with one week to go before reaching Bradford,  Saturday 23rd November in Nottingham seemed ideal. I was hoping I could stay with John and had sent him a message to explain what I was doing. I was in the bookshop in Whitby when I received his response, I remember this because it made me cry! He said of course I'd be welcome to stay and that on the Saturday evening he would love to host a banquet in honour of Ro. I thought this was so beautiful and a wonderful tribute to Ro who loved to eat with others, plus I have had the pleasure of experiencing John's generous hospitality and know he is an excellent cook and host. 

I woke up earlier but didn't get out of bed until 10am, went into the kitchen where John had just made me a cup of tea and was cooking breakfast! I lounged around, drank coffee and was grateful I had planned my rest day on the day of the storm, very happy to have an indoor day. I downloaded my next few day's maps and then John asked me to put together a slide show of photos of Ro which he planned to project onto the wall while we were eating. 

I enjoyed spending an hour or so looking at photos of Ro over the years many of which had been collected from friends before his funeral. There was the last photo I ever took with him at the end of my rabbit themed 40th birthday party in Bradford in August 2023, at the restaurant where I'd enjoyed a curry with friends after a day of fun, food and swimming in Ilkley lido. There's 7 of us and we're pulling silly rabbit faces! When Ro died I felt sad at first that it wasn't a nice smiley photo, but I have plenty of those from over the years and the more I looked at it the more I saw an authentic moment, a literal snapshot of friendship, loved ones who embrace me and my ideas, rabbit themed or otherwise! I felt blessed that many people travelled from near and far for that weekend, and it now feels like my party had a higher purpose as it was the last time I and many others saw Ro. He was living in London and about to start his new job but there was no way he'd have missed celebrating my birthday. 

He helped me prepare for the party and wanted to make a salad. He bought the ingredients and made a delicious crunchy coleslaw, he used half a plastic bottle of mayo and put it in my fridge. It was almost a year before I could take it out, I didn't want to throw it away, I couldn't. He'd touched it and it represented generosity, kindness and a celebration of being alive. One day I decided to cut out the front label, clean it, put it in a box frame and hang it on my kitchen wall, I'm sure I've seen similar in Tate Modern, but this one is priceless!

It is painful we never got to celebrate Ro alive on his 40th. Woody, Mark and I joined members of his family at his graveside on the 17th February 2024 to remember him with love and balloons.

13th August 2024 marked a year since the last time I'd seen Ro as we said goodbye on a station platform in Bradford and he got on the train with a very heavy computer thing (I have no idea what it was!) which he'd got from Facebook market place that morning. He loved a bargain and would often get computers/bikes/fitness equipment this way. The one year anniversary felt significant and I decided to mark it and remember him by going to Leeds where I met my sister Hannah and we drank cocktails and ate fries at Five Guys. 

The reason for this was that on 23rd November (coming back to my walk - the date of my rest day) in 2018 I had been in the hospital in Wolverhampton with my great aunty Audrey (mentioned in an earlier post) as she died. I was close to Audrey and it was a deeply profound moment in my life which I won't go into details about here but I'd travelled down from Yorkshire to say goodbye and hadn't expected she would die in the 4 hours I was there at her bedside. I stayed a little while with her and then caught my train back to Leeds where I was sharing a house with Woody and Ro. It was Friday night and Ro met me in town after work for a drink, he listened as I cried and told him about my day. I suggested cocktails, he followed that with Five Guys then we jumped in a taxi and went to a comedy night in Bradford, it was just what I needed.

Anyway back to the banquet! John creating an ambience fitting for Ro, who he remembered always smelled good, sprayed the hallway with cologne. He laid on a stunning 5 course vegan/veggie feast for me, Woody, Nora, Lorna, Hari and Hugh. All of us except Hugh had sat round a table with Ro multiple times, sharing food and conversation. Puns were flying all over the place, landing to various degrees of success, Ro would have loved it and been joining in (to various degrees of success!). Throughout the evening we talked about many things including Ro, bringing him into the warm space with us. We placed a photo of him on the table.

Unfortunately we couldn't get the tech to work for the slideshow of photos during the meal. John and I both had the same idea that as we have the slideshow we'll have to hold another banquet for Ro in the future, why stop at one!